The Finito Five 9/25/09

Floyd Mayweather had all the right moves against former 135-pounder Juan Manuel Marquez, but will he take those moves and fight Shane Mosley, who is a natural 147-pounder?

Back like Pretty Boy Floyd, it’s the Finito Five!

1. Mayweather is money while Mosley looks to cash in

Floyd Mayweather grates on a lot of boxing fans. The trash talk, the false bravado, the legal and IRS troubles, the ducking of fighters his own weight. Well, likable or not, Pretty Boy Floyd is one of the greatest talents of a generation, perhaps second only to Roy Jones (who also has known to frustrate a boxing fan a time or two himself). As great as Juan Manuel Marquez is, and he will have a plaque in Canestota, he was reduced to a no-hoper just a few rounds in by the superb fistic acumen of Mayweather during their welterweight clash Saturday night. Marquez likely has never seen hands that fast at 130 pounds, let alone at 147. Mayweather just moved out of the way of the Mexican’s punches, then countered with a couple of his own; this dance went on for all twelve rounds, interrupted only when Mayweather scored a knockdown in round two. Marquez was out landed by almost 200 punches, scoring only 69 of his own. Although most expected Floyd to win, the sheer dominance and lack of ring rust was astonishing nonetheless. Give it to Marquez for going the distance, but this was a squash from the word go.

As a matter of fact, the most intriguing part of the fight might well have been the post-fight interview, where Ring Magazine welterweight champion Shane Mosley stormed the ring, calling out Mayweather with a little help from HBO’s Max Kellerman. Mayweather, who shook hands with Mosley, then proceeded with the standard line of my promoter makes my fights, I just fight – as if Floyd had no say in the matter. While Mosley is obviously just looking for a dance partner, as he has had none for some months now, it is doubtful that the fight would ever happen. Say what you will, but Mayweather doesn’t like to fight true 147-pounders, and Mosley has been there for quite some time. The size difference between Mayweather and Marquez was stark, and Mayweather’s prima donna move of coming in two pounds heavy disadvantaged Marquez even more. Manny Pacquiao, Miguel Cotto and Mosley will not have just moved up from 130 pounds, so it will be interesting to see what “Money” does from here.

2. HBO needs to invent a Mayweather-to-English dictionary

HBO’s 24/7 series is always a welcome addition to any superfight, giving fans unmatched insight into each fighter’s camps prior to the main event. Mayweather-Marquez 24/7 was no different, complete with Marquez drinking his own urine and eating raw quail eggs as his preparation and training regimen. Yes, before you ask, we’ll never look at Marquez kissing his wife the same way again. The big gripe was, though, all the Spanish speakers on the program had English subtitles; where were the subtitles for Roger and Floyd Mayweather, Sr.? Seriously, has anyone understood a complete sentence either guy has said in the last ten years? These two make Ozzy Osbourne sound like William F. Buckley! Listening to Roger pontificate about Sugar Ray Robinson, it was unclear whether he thought Robinson was the greatest fighter of all time or an egg salad sandwich. Was it too many headshots for both guys during their careers? Hard to say, but if they showed up at a rehab clinic and merely opened their mouths, they’d likely get admitted right away.

3. Undercard musings

It’s always welcomed when a PPV event such as Mayweather-Marquez has quality undercard fights making it worth the $50 price tag (OK, maybe not worth that much!). In this case, there were two good ones. First, Michael Katsidis, huge tattoo on his back and all, tattooed fellow lightweight Vincente Escobido in a fight that surprised a fair number of people. Although the fight was more competitive than many Internet and newspaper reports have said, Katsidis was still too tough and determined for the overwhelmed Escobido. Look, Katsidis fights the same way every fight; to hang with him, you have to match his work rate and intensity for twelve rounds, and land the more telling shots. Escobido didn’t, and he lost. Also on the card, featherweight Chris John finally got the unanimous decision he deserved over Rocky Juarez after that gift draw in February. Not sure how one judge had it 119-109 for John after Juarez, like he always does, came on after his one millionth slow start and had John holding on for dear life in the final minute of the fight. Man, imagine what Rocky could do if he could manage to win an early round or two! We might be saying, “Manny who?”

4. Shobox rules the roost once again

Does anyone remember HBO’s KO Nation show? Yeah, that was HBO’s answer to Showtime’s new Shobox program, both meant to showcase up-and-coming talent facing off against each other. While KO Nation was complete with dancing girls, fireworks, and hip-hop music, Shobox simply focused on putting together great fights. Well, we know how that turned out (KO Nation didn’t last a year), and last Friday’s Shobox continued to remind fight fans why it’s always worth tuning in. Bantamweight Chris Avalos will soon be must-see TV because this guy is never in a bad fight. His fourth-round KO of Giovanni Caro was a real smoker from the first bell, as both fighters traded so much leather, you would have thought they were breaking in their gloves on a new heavybag. Avalos’ final right hand looked like it was going to remove Caro’s head from his shoulders. That fight was followed by heavyweight Tony Grano’s upset KO of Travis Kauffmann, also in round four. Kauffmann hadn’t yet fought any real competition, but he soon had Grano taking a left on Queer Street at the start of round four. Grano then smartly hit him low and spit out his mouthpiece, giving himself valuable time to recover, then pressed the attack on Kauffmann, taking him out after a furious assault. Kauffmann certainly didn’t see it coming, and neither did the audience. But that’s Shobox; they understand that good matchmaking likely makes for a good result, even if the fighters aren’t top-shelf. Here’s hoping the show lasts another ten years, with Nick Charles back and cancer-free.

5. Bad boxing decisions are evidently not good for one’s health

Teddy Atlas famously once said about his heavyweight pupil Michael Moorer that if he ever had a heart attack, he would blame it on having to train the former champion. While that might seem a little farfetched, try telling that to British boxing promoter Frank Maloney, who apparently did have a heart attack during the heavyweight fight between John McDermott and Tyson Fury on Sept. 11. It’s not known when the actual heart attack occurred, but if it was anytime around when clueless referee Terry O’Connor raised Fury’s hand after Fury got his rear end handed to him by McDermott over ten rounds, it would be understandable. It’s another argument completely why British boxing lets the referee decide the fight (which will be discussed in an upcoming Finito), but at least Maloney braved the possible Big One for a classic postfight quote. “He didn’t even have a mask on,” Maloney said of O’Conner. “Dick Turpin (famous English highway robber of the 1700’s) at least wears a mask when he robs you.”

The Finito Q & A – September edition

Roy Jones may have dressed like a pirate prior to his fight with Jeff Lacy, but he at least lived up to his Captain Hook moniker during their the twelve round fight. Lacy looked more like Black (and blue) Bart after the bout.

Tackling the most pressing questions the fight game has to offer:

Q: Three blogs since the start of July? Just what the hell were you doing all summer?

A: Sorry about that. Truth is, I spent most of my summer moving, which was longer and more arduous than expected. Let me tell you, after not having moved for eight years, I can’t believe how much worthless crap I’ve acquired in that time. Just boxing magazines alone (I still really miss Bert Sugar’s Fight Game, by the way) made me realize my back isn’t what it used to be in my 20’s. Besides, with the dearth of good fights this summer, I guess I don’t feel bad taking the summer off - the promoters apparently took it off, as well.

Q: OK, back to boxing, you slacker. Whatever happened to Roy Jones not fighting past 35?

A: Well, apparently Roy is not Lennox Lewis. Remember, Bernard Hopkins said he’d retire at 40, as well. The lure of the money and accolades are too much for most fighters, and judging from Roy’s dismantling of Jeff Lacy, he’s still pretty good for 40 years old.

Q: So Roy Jones is back to being the old Roy Jones, then? He said as much in the postfight interview.

A: Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. Jeff Lacy is completely shot, even though he looks like a greek god. Although Roy still has good hand speed, Lacy has zero power at 175, as evidenced by the flush headshots he landed on Roy that Jones barely noticed. If that was Chad Dawson or Carl Froch landing those shots, Jones would likely be in a heap on the canvas. As long as Roy takes on this sort of opposition (like Danny Green, his next reported fight), he can fight for a few more years yet.

Q: Going back a few weeks, just how bad a screw job did Paulie Malignaggi get against Juan Diaz?

A: Not the worst I’ve ever seen, but pretty bad nonetheless. Unfortunately, the way Malignaggi fights, he’ll always go the distance, and the law of averages will say he’ll be on the business end of a broomsticking a few times. Still, when he basically explained prior to the fight exactly how he’d get screwed, and it happened exactly that way, that’s not good for boxing. What this does is seriously hurt Diaz’ ability to bring big fights back to Texas, because no one outside of the state will trust that commission.

Q: You’ve been all over Julio Ceasar Chavez, Jr. in previous blogs. Does his smoking of Jason LeHoullier finally convince you Junior is for real?

A: Look, I never said JC Jr. wasn’t talented; I just need to see him in a real fight. His supporters claim that flattening LeHoullier, who has a sturdy chin, inside of a round shows how good Chavez has become. While all of that is fine, let’s now get in the ring with Felix Sturm or Anthony Mundine. It’s time we see what Chavez can do against top ten guys – we already know what he can do with mid-level opposition. Otherwise, if all he’s going to do are these PPV fights, who cares how good he is or isn’t? Unless it’s against real competition eventually, it’s a moot point.

Q: So how lucky was Fernando Montiel to escape his fight against Alex Valdez with a technical draw Saturday night on the Chavez undercard?

A: Let’s put it this way, he must have made a quick trip to Ireland on Friday to kiss the Blarney stone. How “Cochulito” managed to escape the beating he was taking from Valdez without losing would make Harry Houdini proud. Of course Montiel got help from some incompetent officiating by referee Jesus Salcedo, who decided that after Montiel got cut in the first round by an obvious punch, he just didn’t need to inform anyone whether it was caused by a punch or not. It was an interesting scene after the fight ended in round three due to the cut, because no one had any idea what Salcedo had actually ruled. It was first called a technical draw, then changed to a KO win for Valdez, then back to a draw after the commission said they made a mistake. Valdez and his team were understandably ticked off; Montiel was just lucky he looked so terrible and got away with it.

Q: And what about Ivan Calderon and Rodel Mayol going to a second straight technical draw due to another cut on Calderon’s forehead? Weird, huh?

A: If styles make fights, the styles between these two 108-pounders make for a busted Calderon forehead. The only difference was the first fight was stopped in round six, this one in round seven. This time around, though, I thought that Calderon was headed towards putting this one away, had it gone the distance. Still, if you had gone to Vegas and bet this result, you’d be able to buy the arena for the third fight between these two!

Q: Andre Ward and Mikkel Kessler took care of business in their tune-ups, and are ready to face each other in November. So, are you excited for the Super Six tournament?

A: Are you kidding? This is the coolest thing to happen to boxing since Compubox! Man, think about it; Arthur Abraham-Jermain Taylor and Carl Froch-Andre Dirrell next month, followed by Ward-Kessler a month later. That’s some serious talent on display. Showtime really hit the jackpot with this one, which they routinely seem to do. They may not have the budget HBO does, but quick, name the bad fights you’ve seen in the last two years on Showtime Championship Boxing – it’s a short list. The network has really done boxing fans a favor here.

Q: After watching the Mayweather-Marquez 24/7 series so far, what do you find harder to fathom - that Marquez drinks his own urine, or that Roger Mayweather wants “to be good people”?

A: Well, these are two different things. We have video evidence of Marquez drinking his own urine; as for the other, Mayweather can desire to be the Eiffel Tower, but I’ll believe it when I see it. Sorry (and maybe I sound like everybody’s grandfather here), but you can’t have gone to jail for assault on your son’s grandmother and be up for yet another assault and be on the good person list. The whole Mayweather clan is about as likeable as swine flu.

Q: You know this would have to be asked sooner or later – do you buy Marquez’ assertion that he drinks his urine to recover his lost vitamins and proteins?

A: That’s like picking through the garbage in case you left some edible food in the trash bag, isn’t it? You certainly can do it, but it’s much easier to go to the store and get new food. Urine is a waste product for a reason; if there are vitamins and proteins lost, then get take some Centrum and eat a freakin’ turkey sandwich! It’s much easier and tastier. Unfortunately, as much as I have loved Marquez for years, whenever I see him now, the pee drinking will be the first thing I think of. Hope he gets an endorsement deal out of this from Scope or something. Yeesh.